Is happiness a choice?

Have you ever thought about what brings you joy? I mean…what truly brings you joy?

Have you consciously counted the number of times you felt such joy throughout the day?

Many of us are in the hustle and bustle of life and haven’t intentionally sat down to think about what joy and happiness looks like in our relationships and parenting.

Here’s a simple strategy that I love: TRACK YOUR JOY POINTS

Joy points are sweet little moments that we recognize as “joyful.”  They can be happy thoughts, pleasant sensory experiences, kind acts done either by us or for us.  If we set out to track at least 25 per day, we can’t help but to feel better despite what’s going on around us.

Here are a few examples of my joy points from the day I wrote this:

  • My 14 1/2  year old dog was so sound asleep that I was afraid she had died. When she lifted up her head, I felt JOY!!
  • Waking up and feeling less stressed than I have in months because I just finished my first online parenting course – hooray!
  • Having time to make quiche for breakfast and my kids loving it – joy!
  • Answering the phone and hearing my oldest son’s deep voice say, “Mom.” I love the sound of that word in his grown-up voice. Joy point!

You may be saying to yourself, “Coming up with just 5 joy points seems difficult to do.” But Oh Honey, let me tell you…potential joy points are all around us, it’s just a matter of us being intentional about noticing them and consciously feeling joy.

It can be that first sip of coffee. The sound of a loved one’s voice. The smile or touch of your child. Shifting from the critical internal voice to a kinder voice.  Slipping into soft sheets. They’re everywhere!

What are your recent joy points?  I’d love to hear!  Email me.


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Kerry Stutzman MSW, LMFT

My passion is helping my clients develop close, connected families and healthy relationships. For the past 20 years I have been helping people discover the best version of themselves.  Learn more

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