Do you find yourself having the same frustrating arguments with your kid or partner over and over? You know, the ones where you feel hurt or worried… something tender… but somehow spirals into defensiveness and anger on both sides.
These repetitive fights remind me of long childhood bus rides. We’d belt out “100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” (or “pop on the wall” at church camp 😅). The part that sticks with me is how we’d enthusiastically shout: “second verse, same as the first, a little bit louder and a little bit worse!” By the twentieth verse, we were practically hoarse – but kept going anyway.
Sound familiar? Like you’re in an exhausting loop of the same tense, uncomfortable fight with your loved one over and over, just like that endless childhood song?
This often happens because both you and your loved one fall into default emotional patterns – patterns shaped by what our childhood families taught us about “acceptable” versus “unacceptable” emotions.
Until we learn to expand our emotional awareness and embrace all our feelings, we remain stuck – both in our own minds (cycling through the same thoughts) and in our relationships with others.
If this resonates with you, I have something that could be a game-changer for your relationships. I recently had the pleasure of joining Kate Gladdin on her podcast, where I share a powerful communication technique that helps break these cycles of disconnection. Instead of falling into the same old patterns of expressing yourself, imagine being able to:
- Navigate difficult conversations with more confidence and clarity
- Express your vulnerable feelings without getting defensive
- Actually feel heard and understood by your loved ones
- Help your partner or teen open up in ways they never have before
In our conversation, I demonstrate this practical skill that I’ve seen transform so many relationships in my therapy practice – with both parents with teens and couples. It’s a technique you can start using at home right away, and the best part? It’s simpler than you might think.
Kate (a motivational speaker, best-selling author, and resilience coach with a delightful Aussie accent! 🤣) and I dive deep into how this approach can help you break free from those frustrating patterns that keep you stuck. You can find our conversation on Kate’s website or wherever you listen to podcasts.
Ready to transform those “same verse, different day” arguments into conversations that actually bring you closer?
P.S. In case you’re wondering…. YES! Palmer became a dad on Wednesday! Mama and baby are doing great! My grandma-heart is overflowing with love over that little baby as well as watching Palmer and his lovely wife adjust to parenthood. 🥰 I imagine Palmer might have something to say about this in his email next Sunday.
